Cute is Fleeting; Beautiful is Forever

the beautiful Tia Good 

(l-r) my mom, Saundra in her teens, cousin Joan and a friend

My beautiful mother, who was undeniably born and lived most of her life epitomizing conventional beauty, still has horrendous stories of her personal challenges with overcoming insecurity. Her Sade (the singer, of course) complexion made people call her “white girl”. Her skinny, tall body inclined neighborhood kids to call her 'string bean' and Olive Oil (Popeye's wife). Her sandy brown hair and face full of freckles earned her the two nicknames she still identifies with today--Big Reds and Sand Man (a little butch, but she's straight. I promise!).

Now, in sharp contrast, my uncle Jerry was born and still is the color of pumpernickel, and though very handsome, teased for being dark. Many of my mother's peers were "thick", even as children (today they would be deemed unhealthy or overweight). And more than a handful of her girlfriends back then would have easily traded her face full of freckles for the barrage of acne breakouts they endured.

tiffany welch, stunningly beautiful inside and out...

In truth, it's often that many lighter-skinned people want to be darker; a significant number of skinny people want to gain weight; women dissatisfied with their boobies seek breast reductions or enlargements; and of course tons of brothers with average-sized penises nearly kill themselves each day pulling, tugging and positioning to create illusions of...well you know.

So where is beauty anyway? Where does it live? Is it in a golden complexion or in the joints of ideal body proportions? Could it be hiding behind straight teeth or within the roots of some unsuspecting sista's quaff? Or is beauty far too often marginalized and mistaken for "attractiveness", a rather personal perspective developed over years of personal experiences? 

As a photographer, I run into the same two lines over and over again:

•               Imma book a photography session with you as soon as I lose this weight.

•               I'm not photogenic! (This is the saddest and most ridiculous to me, though I      completely understand it's origin.)

Believe it or not, there are really people in the world who believe that they are not photogenic, and what the hell does that mean? Well, I'm glad you asked.

my beautiful friend Jerome and his beautiful mother

People who believe that they are not photogenic must also believe that they should have been born as someone else, with some other face, body, skin...you get the 'picture'. I mean, we are all unique, so how could there ever be a “most beautiful woman in the world” People Magazine? I mean, Beyonce is a beautiful sista, but come on! The deciders haven’t even seen all of the women in the freaking world, so how would they gage who is "the most beautiful"? It’s rather presumptuous and impossible, if you ask me. Bottom line--Beauty grows out of experiences, all of our ups and downs, successes and failures, and of course those moments when we fall into that paralyzing limbo where we are coming or going. All of those things make us beautiful. And remember this--each time we devalue anyone's beauty, we send a message to some kid, woman or man that the way they were created just wasn't good enough.

the beautiful 85 year old Mr. Brown (35 biological children)

The saddest thing for me to witness lately is the increasing insecurities far too many black people face concerning their beauty. Forget all of that ‘Nubian’ this and ‘Mother of the World’ that. Being alive in and of itself is flat out the most beautiful thing there is!  So now what?

Now, we begin to value our lives and our experiences more than we have before. We embrace our own and others' life-steps as mere trails pre-designed by The Creator to guide us toward our purposes.

Value your own beauty today as far deeper than how cute you think you are or are not! Love your look, but fall in love with your experience!

What a joy it is to bear conscious witness to the wonderful experience that we, the descendants of humanity and spirit through Africa and the Americas, live on this land.

Be beautiful from soul to surface everyday! Nobody is more beautiful than you! Nobody. 

Now, book a shoot with me!  www.dwphotographyandcreative.com